Dursin's Dungeon - I Watched the Watchmen. Did you?
We had this grand plan, you see. Bring the digital recorder down to the theater and make a podcast out of going to see the movie. Brilliant! Revolutionary! Interview some folks as we wait in line for one of the most-anticipated comic book movies of all-time, and one that was opening in a record number of theaters for an R-rated movie. The Watchmen podcast. It was gold!
Unfortunately, John was called away on business at the last minute and could not attend. No worries, though. We still had 2 gentlemen there, and throngs of fans dressed as Rorschach to talk to. I had fresh batteries in the recorder, two high alcohol-content beers in me from dinner, and we were ready to go.
Josh and I walked up, picked up our pre-ordered tickets, bought popcorn and soda, walked into the theater and sat down and watched the movie. No throngs. No Rorschachs. Nothing. The damn thing wasn't even sold out on opening night in Boston. What happened? Did they open it on too many screens? It apprently earned $25.1 million in one day, so it may not break any records, but that's more than a lot of films make in weeks. Did everyone go at midnight? For the first time in my life, I was disappointed not to see fanboys.
Let's not let that hamper our enjoyment, however. Let's talk about the movie itself. Of course, as has been discussed on the show, I tend to be a little harsh on my entertainment, and movies especially. It's only because I have a film degree, and learning all that crap made me a bit of a stickler. And I can't turn it off. I'm sorry. I find it difficult to enjoy movies when I know so many ways they could have been better.
But I'll say it right here: I enjoyed Watchmen. I mean, sex, violence, super-heroes. What's not to love, really, other than Billy Crudup's little blue Crudup every five seconds? I was not a gigantic fan of the comic anyway, so I didn't really care that the ending was changed. I just sat there with my popcorn and watched the pretty people beat on each other. Not the best script certainly, and the acting was stiff at times, but I'm trying to be better about these things, and it was certainly a technical marvel that will undoubtedly murder people on IMAX. What really do we need from our movies?
My only complaint is the running time. By the time you get there early, sit through commercials, and previews, and the warnings to turn off your cellphone, then the little thing called the-reason-you-went-there-in-the-first-place, you're into this thing for well over three hours. Anything you invest that kind of time in better be amazing, so I can see why the reviews are mixed. Honestly, there aren't too many things I want to do for three hours straight, and sitting in a dark room is not one of them. Even if you go to a baseball game, that will probably last about that long, you get to talk, get up and get a beer, talk to the person next to you. All of the sudden, it's the 7th inning stretch. Sitting through a three-hour epic comic book movie? All of the sudden, I looked up and they were still developing Dr. Manhattan's character. I know that's important and all, but seriously? There was about a 45-minute stretch there in the middle where Rorschach and Nite Owl weren't even in the damn thing, and I kind of thought they were the main characters. Don't you think it would have been possible to get those Dr. Manhattan Mars scenes over in about ten minutes and get on with the actual plot? My screenwriting profs always taught me to "Get in and get out" when it came to developing your story. Why do we have to see him looking at a clock for all that time? To further drive home the point that this a long-ass movie? And I'm not just saying this because he was naked.
Don't let me poop on the parade, though. Overall, I think it was a decent movie. John may have put it best when he said it was "better than Indy 4 but not as good as Dark Knight." While that is a pretty wide open field, I think in the annals of comic book adaptations, that is where Watchmen (and most movies) will end up. I will also say, however, that IMAX will probably help this film because IMAX platters need films to be a shorter running time (according to Wikipedia, about 150 minutes). This will necessitate some trimming, unless they just want to show the regular old movie on a really huge screen. This trimming of the fat may help the movie flow better, and probably give crumb-bums like me less to complain about.
In the end, it's a comic book movie. Not as riveting as the original graphic novel, not as deep, not as ground-breaking. But, my advice would be to get yourself a nice, big bag of popcorn and hunker down and watch the Watchmen do their thing. Just get the small soda.
Unfortunately, John was called away on business at the last minute and could not attend. No worries, though. We still had 2 gentlemen there, and throngs of fans dressed as Rorschach to talk to. I had fresh batteries in the recorder, two high alcohol-content beers in me from dinner, and we were ready to go.
Josh and I walked up, picked up our pre-ordered tickets, bought popcorn and soda, walked into the theater and sat down and watched the movie. No throngs. No Rorschachs. Nothing. The damn thing wasn't even sold out on opening night in Boston. What happened? Did they open it on too many screens? It apprently earned $25.1 million in one day, so it may not break any records, but that's more than a lot of films make in weeks. Did everyone go at midnight? For the first time in my life, I was disappointed not to see fanboys.
Let's not let that hamper our enjoyment, however. Let's talk about the movie itself. Of course, as has been discussed on the show, I tend to be a little harsh on my entertainment, and movies especially. It's only because I have a film degree, and learning all that crap made me a bit of a stickler. And I can't turn it off. I'm sorry. I find it difficult to enjoy movies when I know so many ways they could have been better.
But I'll say it right here: I enjoyed Watchmen. I mean, sex, violence, super-heroes. What's not to love, really, other than Billy Crudup's little blue Crudup every five seconds? I was not a gigantic fan of the comic anyway, so I didn't really care that the ending was changed. I just sat there with my popcorn and watched the pretty people beat on each other. Not the best script certainly, and the acting was stiff at times, but I'm trying to be better about these things, and it was certainly a technical marvel that will undoubtedly murder people on IMAX. What really do we need from our movies?
My only complaint is the running time. By the time you get there early, sit through commercials, and previews, and the warnings to turn off your cellphone, then the little thing called the-reason-you-went-there-in-the-first-place, you're into this thing for well over three hours. Anything you invest that kind of time in better be amazing, so I can see why the reviews are mixed. Honestly, there aren't too many things I want to do for three hours straight, and sitting in a dark room is not one of them. Even if you go to a baseball game, that will probably last about that long, you get to talk, get up and get a beer, talk to the person next to you. All of the sudden, it's the 7th inning stretch. Sitting through a three-hour epic comic book movie? All of the sudden, I looked up and they were still developing Dr. Manhattan's character. I know that's important and all, but seriously? There was about a 45-minute stretch there in the middle where Rorschach and Nite Owl weren't even in the damn thing, and I kind of thought they were the main characters. Don't you think it would have been possible to get those Dr. Manhattan Mars scenes over in about ten minutes and get on with the actual plot? My screenwriting profs always taught me to "Get in and get out" when it came to developing your story. Why do we have to see him looking at a clock for all that time? To further drive home the point that this a long-ass movie? And I'm not just saying this because he was naked.
Don't let me poop on the parade, though. Overall, I think it was a decent movie. John may have put it best when he said it was "better than Indy 4 but not as good as Dark Knight." While that is a pretty wide open field, I think in the annals of comic book adaptations, that is where Watchmen (and most movies) will end up. I will also say, however, that IMAX will probably help this film because IMAX platters need films to be a shorter running time (according to Wikipedia, about 150 minutes). This will necessitate some trimming, unless they just want to show the regular old movie on a really huge screen. This trimming of the fat may help the movie flow better, and probably give crumb-bums like me less to complain about.
In the end, it's a comic book movie. Not as riveting as the original graphic novel, not as deep, not as ground-breaking. But, my advice would be to get yourself a nice, big bag of popcorn and hunker down and watch the Watchmen do their thing. Just get the small soda.
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